Today’s Sermon at the Church Of Chuckles
The King James Version
1. And lo, There was in the same country a wall both great and strong.
2. And the Egg sitteth on this wall, yea verily, as at other times, [even] upon a seat on the wall, (he is exceeding proud) his loftiness, and his arrogancy, and his pride, and the haughtiness of his heart: and the man arose, and didst say:
3. Behold, I will send a blast upon him, and he shall hear a rumour, and I will cause him to fall from his place. For if any fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him [that is] alone when he falleth; for [he hath] not another to help him up.
4. And he did send a blast upon him and he did fall from his place. How are the mighty fallen. And God saw the Egg fall.
5. And the Egg was burst asunder, was shattered into pieces as numerous as the stars, yea all the stars, that men seeth when they glance unto the heavens. The did the Egg speak, and he did say:
6. I wot not whist I am nor whence I came. I was at ease, but he hath broken me asunder: he hath also taken [me] by my neck, and shaken me to pieces. Behold, who shall surely gather me together for my sake?
7. When the news of the great fall was brought unto the king he was sore troubled. By the river of Babylon he sat down and wept. Then the king ariseth, and thus did say:
8. I will surely assemble thee, O Egg, all of thee; I will gather thy remnants; I will put them together as the sheep of the field, as the flock in the midst of their fold: we shall make great noise by reason of [the
multitude of] my men.
9. And he called forth to his men saying: Arise, men of valour and strength and gird your loins. Mount ye your horses and riden outen at my command, that ye travel to the great wall. And there ye shall find, lying at the base, an egg, in pieces several and ye shall grieve.
10. But I say unto you, gird your loins and seeketh every piece, yea even unto the smallest thereof, and then remaketh whole the egg again. And whence thou hast finished, and the egg is as it was whence it were on topoth the wall, bring ye it to me that I may marvel at it.
11. And they came with haste, and their number was seven times seventy, to where the Egg didst lie broken. And when they saw it they were sore afraid, for they knew not whether `twas in their power to assemble yon Egg ast it had been in the beginning.
12. And though they girdeth their loins, and toileth as the lily in the fields toileth not, verily the pieces wouldst not and couldst not be brought together again.
13. When the news was brought even unto the king, the king was filled with great wrath. And all gates trembled, and the voice of the turtle was stilled.
14. Then out went the king, and he pondered these words in his heart: What man has rent asunder, let no god join together.
15. For, it is written: Pride [goeth] before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall