The Washington Post’s Style Invitational once again asked readers to take
any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding,subtracting, or changing
one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year’s winners.
1 – Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding a stupid person that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little
sign of breaking down in the near future.
2 – Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
3 – Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the
subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
4 – Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
5 – Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person who doesn’t get it.
6 – Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
7 – Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
8 – Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
9 – Karmageddon: It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these
really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like,
a serious bummer.
10- Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.
11- Glibido: All talk and no action.
12- Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when
they come at you rapidly.
13- Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after
you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.
14- Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your
bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15- Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in
the fruit you’re eating.